“Snow Fallies”

A Holiday Around the Lake

By Tonya Olson

It’s been a long, strange four months full of firsts for me; my first 50miler, first 100k and now my first 50k.  Thanks to David Horton and the Blue Ridge Mountains, each race has brought unique challenges and experiences; the full effects of which are resonating throughout my being, to be fully realized as time passes and the echoes settle into their final destinations.  It has all been a surreal homecoming of sorts.  The training, races and people I’ve met have transformed my understanding of who I am and completely scrambled my notion of limitations.  Since running Mt. Masochist as my first ultra, I have not only attempted what I thought was impossible-I’ve accomplished it!  My life is now divided into two phases; BH (before Horton) and AH (after Horton) or before Hellgate/after Hellgate. 

Masochist scared me, Hellgate scarred me, and Holiday Lake settled me.  At the start of Holiday Lake, I had hoped to feel better, to run faster and set out optimistically, but my legs had other ideas.  So, I settled into a comfortable pace and let my mind wander.  I never thought the words “only” and “50k” would come out of my mouth. I found it comforting that the distance of Holiday Lake was not a first, I had an idea of what to expect and looked forward to having time to think and reflect during the miles ahead. I had been feeling frazzled in the months before the race and looked forward to some down time on the trail to smooth out the rough edges of Hellgate’s effects on my body and being.  Without the pressure of concerns about whether I could survive the distance, I had the luxury of simply enjoying the day, so I ran along ruminating over trials and trifles, unconcerned with time, wet feet, solitude and soggy underwear.  I weighed the pros and cons of crucial decisions such as, paper versus plastic, wool versus synthetic, boxers or briefs? (Imagine a certain race director in red bikini briefs) that visual entertained me through many a mile!  My mind turned to crucial socio-environmental issues such as; where do frogs go in the winter?  How many Jelly Belly jelly beans constitute a mouthful?  Which is bigger-a buttload, a truckload or a s---load?  Are there really ivory beaked woodpeckers alive in Arkansas…isn’t David Horton from Arkansas?  I wonder if he’s ever seen one, wonder if he’s ever killed one?  I’ll have to ask…

I ran clutching salty potatoes that Charlie and Kim told me to eat at the aid stations; I dutifully followed their advice but took forever to eat as there were no walking breaks on this course-dang!  I reminded myself sternly that if I could shuffle along at Hellgate, I certainly had no reason to walk at Holiday Lake! I reflected on my attitude about the slow pace and was pleased with my ability to adapt to the day and adjust my goals accordingly.  I could have struggled along, striving to coax speed out of my unwilling legs and completely miss the experience of the time spent observing myself and others, reflecting, settling into who I was to become as a runner through the experience.  I made goals for the year such as, gathering the courage to pee standing up…in public (on a trail, of course), learning to play the guitar, make banana bread…I strove to enjoy the little things such as the gently falling snow, the other runners and their camaraderie along the course, the blessing of having feet that can feel cold during creek crossings, praised God for the two girls in the woods with the face paint and boom box-cheering their lungs out and standing in the cold for total strangers, the little boy named Cutter at every aid station-rosy cheeks and all cheering as runners past brought tears of gratitude for the future to my eyes.  “Children are God’s promise that the world will go on”, wish I could remember who said that…My biggest regret was not indulging in the Twinkies at one of the later aid stations.  I left the course a little sheepish about my time, yet focused in a way that I had not been in months.  I found motivation out there, made new friends and healed, integrating the raw edges of Hellgate into the person I am and seek to become and left the course feeling more whole and grounded than I have in years.  Thank you to all who made Holiday Lake 50++k possible!